An ex-projectionist and armchair film critic reminisces...
My first cinematic experience was in 1968 when, at the formative age of 6, I was taken to see the original Planet of the Apes. In the darkness of the theater, I was awestruck at how I was transported to an imaginary world, then magically returned to reality after two hours.
I craved the cinematic experience for the next decade, but as a child, was only seldom afforded the opportunity to go. At an early multiplex, I once sneaked up the stairs and peered into a dimly lit projection booth, to marvel at the film chugging through the projectors at 24 frames per second.
On
my 16th birthday, with driver's license in hand and eligible for after-school
work, I applied for a $2.16/hour part-time job as usher at (now defunct)
Turnpike Cinema in Fairfax, Virginia. When the elderly couple who managed
the place offered to train me to run projectors, I eagerly accepted. Turnpike
Cinema's booth was so old, it still had the firescreens attached to strings,
to be released if the film caught fire. (Very early films were highly
flammable.) The booth had two projectors, which alternated 20-minute reels
six times or so throughout any given showing. Inside a projector, high-voltage
electricity sparked a carbon arc lamp, which reflected off a parabolic
mirror to shine light through the film, projecting the movie over the
heads of the audience and out onto the screen.
A mechanical bell would chime toward the end of a given reel, signaling "get ready for changeover." If the alternate projector wasn't threaded up in advance, the audience saw the dreaded 5-4-3-2-1, then white screen. But 20 minutes is plenty of time to thread the next reel, so it was then a matter of watching for two changeover marks to roll by in the upper right corner of the screen. (Watch for these, when you see your next movie.) First mark, roll the film and open the shudder. Second mark, flip the changeover switch. With practice, these changeovers were so seamless, the audience never noticed.
By
the way, I dedicate this webpage to the drive-in
movie theater, an institution sacred to yesterday's teenagers, but
sadly unknown to today's. I'd frequent the (now defunct, replaced by a
Costco and a Home Depot) Super-29 Drive-In less than a mile from my home,
frequently sneaking my compliant date through the gate in the trunk of
my MGB convertible! (Don't worry, I let her out once inside, as promised.)
After graduating high school, I went off to college in Boulder, Colorado, where projectionists were unionized. I scored a better paying job as relief projectionist for various theaters, including the giant Flatirons Theater on University Hill, a (now defunct) Art Cinema on Boulder Mall, the (also now defunct) Holiday Drive-In on the outskirts of town, campus screenings, and others. These more modern projection booths featured "platters," where all reels of a given movie were spliced together into one continuous strip of film, requiring only one projector per theater. Xenon bulbs replaced the old carbon arc lamps. With more modern equipment, my job generally became easier. At least, no more changeovers!
One
exception to this was the drive-in, which could suffer sudden mechanical
failures. Drive-in speakers are wired like Christmas tree lights, where
an outage in one speaker will affect all speakers from that point forward.
The projectionist only knows of a problem when, you guessed it, everybody
starts honking their horns. I'd hustle out to the horn-honking area with
screwdriver in hand, locate the offending speaker, and perform on-the-spot
open heart surgery. Cheers indicated success.
The experience not only paid my way through college, it exposed me to many hundreds of films I wouldn't otherwise have seen. After showing Reds or Raiders of the Lost Ark all summer long, I knew the script by heart, but still discovered nuances every time I saw the film. Others would be part of a rapidly changing Art Cinema calendar where, like with Quadrophenia or Gallipoli, I'd be forever moved after seeing them only once.
Having handled so much film with my fingers, I relate to it on a visceral level, as a mechanic would a car, or as a doctor would a body. Movies have profoundly influenced me, including the foreign travels I embarked upon, my musical preferences, my spiritual and political beliefs, my understanding of individual and societal weakness, my choice of career and spouse... basically, every decision I've ever made in life, adding up to who I am today. Cinema is an art medium like no other.
Having such a lifetime bond to the cinema, it may surprise you to hear that I have vowed never to set foot inside a movie theater again! I just got fed up with the mobile phones going off in the audience, exorbitant ticket prices, shoddy projection work (out-of-frame or out-of-focus), audience members talking during the movie, perfumed audience members, the disgusting smell of buttered popcorn (which I never did like), lax management and staff, serious scratches running the entire length of a reel, etc. The quality of a cinema experience, always patchy, has dropped like a rock in recent years. So what was my solution? I got a 34-inch 16:9 flatscreen television with a DVD player and a Netflix subscription. Now, I knock over several movies each week in the comfort of my own living room. At least, I can hit the pause button and go take a leak without missing any part of a film!
So without further ado, I present my diverse collection of favorites. They are in alphabetical order, since I couldn't possibly rank-order them. It's biased toward small-time foreign art films, tragic endings, corporate responsibility, triumph-over-adversity, and post black-and-white era films. The list is obviously work-in-progress.
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1986 |
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USA |
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Director: Adrian Lyne |
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Starring: Kim Basinger, Mickey Rourke |
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1979 |
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USA |
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Director: Ridley Scott |
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Starring: Sigourney Weaver |
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1984 |
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USA |
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Director: Miloš Forman |
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Starring: Tom Hulce, F. Murray Abraham |
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Not an historically accurate portrayal of Antonio
Salieri.
It is unlikely that any rivalry he had with Mozart
resulted in poisoning. |
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2006 |
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USA |
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Director: Mel Gibson |
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Starring: Rudy Youngblood |
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Love or hate Mel Gibson, this film is spectacular in its costumes, make-up, cinematography, and set design. Also, very ambitious, being acted entirely in an ancient Yucatan Mayan language. Rife with historical inaccuracies. For starters, Mayan civilization fell centuries before the arrival of Conquistadors. It's unlikely they'd locate an open mass grave so close to crops. And tribes within walking distance of a city would surely have known about it. But hey, artistic license granted! |
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1982 |
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USA |
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Director: Kevin Rafferty |
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Starring: N/A (Docu-Comedy) |
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Funny
but sobering collection of Cold War propaganda. |
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1995 |
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Australia |
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Director: Chris Noonan |
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Starring: James Cromwell, Magda Szubanski |
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Pig
becomes useful to avoid becoming dinner. |
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1993 |
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Australia |
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Director: Rolf de Heer |
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Starring: Nicholas Hope |
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"God can see everything I do - and he's gonna beat me brainless." Extremely dark humor. First 30 minutes rough. And you think you had a difficult childhood? |
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1990 |
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USA |
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Director: Curtis Hanson |
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Starring: Rob Lowe, James Spader |
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Demonic
drifter progressively destroys yuppie. |
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1993 |
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USA |
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Director: Ron Fricke |
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Starring: (Documentary) |
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Collage
of images and music. No dialog (a "non-verbal" film).
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2003 |
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USA |
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Director: Tracy Droz Tragos |
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Starring: (Documentary) |
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A
daughter's journey to know her father, 30 years after his death in Vietnam.
The film's title comes from the phrase Lt. Droz used to close his letters
home.
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1979 |
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USA |
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Director: Hal Ashby |
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Starring: Peter Sellers, Shirley McLaine |
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Betty
Blue |
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1986 |
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France |
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Director: Jean-Jacques Beineix |
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Starring: Béatrice Dalle, Jean-Hugues Anglade |
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2005 |
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USA / Ireland |
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Director: Edward Zwick |
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Starring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Jennifer Connelly, Djimon Hounsou |
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1966 |
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USA / Ireland |
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Director: John Guillermin |
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Starring: George Peppard, Ursula Andress, James Mason |
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WW I German aviator seeks highest
award. Dogfight scenes eat Top Gun for lunch. |
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1981 |
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USA |
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Director: Lawrence Kasdan |
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Starring: Kathleen Turner, William Hurt |
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1980 |
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Australia |
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Director: Bruce Beresford |
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Starring: Jack Thompson, Bryan Brown, Edward Woodward |
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Military
courtroom drama involving three Australian soldiers of the Bushveldt
Carbineers, set near the end of the Boer War (1899-1902). Based on a
true story. |
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1987 |
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Australia |
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Director:
Mark Lewis
Starring:
(Docu-Comedy)
Exogenous
species multiplies unchecked. | |||||
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Charlie Wilson's War | ||||
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2007 |
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USA |
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Director:
Mike Nichols
Starring:
Tom Hanks,
Julia Roberts,
Philip Seymour Hoffman True story
of how one colorful character wielded influence to help David conquer
Goliath | |||||
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1968 |
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USA / UK |
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Director: Ken Hughes |
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Starring: Dick van Dyke |
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From
an Ian Fleming (of James Bond fame) story. |
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1988 |
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France / Italy |
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Director: Guiseppe Tornatore |
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Starring: (Italian cast) |
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Movie theater projectionist comes
of age. A little schmalzy. |
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2005 |
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UK |
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Director: Fernando Meirelles |
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Starring: Ralph Fiennes, Rachel Weisz |
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As described by one critic, "a distressingly convincing corrupt world where everyone is guilty and no one is responsible." |
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2005 |
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Canada |
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Director: Mark Achbar, Jennifer Abbott |
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Starring: Michael Moore, Howard Zinn, Noam Chomsky |
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Based on the book The Corporation: The Pathological Pursuit of Profit and Power by Joel Bakan. |
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1978 |
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USA |
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Director: George A. Romero |
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Starring: N/A |
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Schlock
horror cannibal zombie apocalypse. It's so bad, it's good. |
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1990 |
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USA |
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Director: Kevin Costner |
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Starring: Kevin Costner, Mary McDonnell |
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A little schmaltzy, but outstanding cinematography. |
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1989 |
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USA |
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Director: Peter Weir |
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Starring: Robin Williams, Ethan Hawke |
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The Diving Bell and the Butterfly | |
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2007 |
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France |
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Director: Julian Schnabel |
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Starring:
Mathieu Amalric,
Emmanuelle Seigner,
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At 43, Jean-Dominique Bauby, charismatic editor of French magazine Elle, suffered a massive stroke rendering his brain stem inactive. After 20 days in coma, he awoke to find himself mentally alert and with imagination and memory intact, but a prisoner inside his own body. He used his only means of communicating with the outside world, blinking alphabetic code with his left eye, to write a book about his experience. |
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1992 |
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USA |
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Director: Robert Rodriguez |
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Starring: N/A |
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Made
in 2 weeks for $7,000. Simply awesome. |
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1980 |
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USA / UK |
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Director: David Lynch |
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Starring: John Hurt, Anthony Hopkins, John Gielgud |
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From the director of Eraserhead, a story of tremendous cruelty, compassion,
and courage towards
Joseph Merrick, a
19th Century London man suffering severe congenital disfigurement. |
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Click here. | ||
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1987 |
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USA |
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Director:Adrian Lyne |
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Starring: Michael Douglas, Glen Close |
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Extramarital
fling leads to boiling bunny. Ending was modified to suit test audiences'
preferences. |
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1986 |
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USA |
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Director: John Hughes |
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Starring: Matthew Broderick, Jennifer Grey |
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Teen
cuts class to help troubled friend. |
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1994 |
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USA |
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Director: Robert Zemekis |
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Starring: Tom Hanks, Gary Sinise |
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Intellectually challenged fellow charts history seeking love. |
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1982 |
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USA |
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Director: Graeme Clifford |
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Starring: Jessica Lange |
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Society
& self conspire to wreck actress Frances
Farmer. |
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1981 |
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Australia |
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Director: Peter Weir |
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Starring: Mel Gibson |
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Young
Western Australian pressured into famous WWI battle. |
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1997 |
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USA |
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Director: David Fincher |
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Starring: Michael Douglas, Sean Penn |
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Psychological
thriller. |
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1992 |
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USA |
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Director: James Foley |
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Starring: Jack Lemmon, Al Pacino, Alec Baldwin, Kevin Spacey |
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Character
study in this stage play turned film. |
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1972 |
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USA |
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Director: Francis Ford Coppola |
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Starring: Marlon Brando, Al Pacino, James Caan, Robert Duvall |
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Early Coppola was good Coppola. |
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1974 |
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USA |
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Director: Francis Ford Coppola |
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Starring: Al Pacino, Robert De Niro, Robert Duvall |
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1997 |
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USA |
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Director: Gus Van Sant, Jr. |
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Starring: Matt Damon, Ben Affleck, Robin Williams |
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Awesome
story, dialog, acting. Triumphant breakthrough achievement for two young
guys.
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2005 |
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USA |
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Director: Davis Guggenheim |
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Starring: Al Gore |
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1999 |
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USA |
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Director: Michael Mann |
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Starring: Russell Crowe, Al Pacino |
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Dr.
Jeffrey Wigand heroically exposes Big Tobacco. This guy is my personal
hero. |
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2007 |
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USA |
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Director: Sean Penn |
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Starring: Emile Hirsch, William Hurt, Hal Holbrook |
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1986 |
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France / Italy |
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Director: Claude Berri |
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Starring: Gerard Depardieu, Daniel Auteuil |
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Hunchback struggles to keep his farm alive. See this before Manon of the Spring. |
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1991 |
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USA |
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Director: Oliver Stone |
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Starring: Kevin Costner, Joe Pesci, Sissy Spacek |
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Iconoclast D.A. challenges Warren Report. Awesome editing. |
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The
Killer |
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1989 |
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Hong Kong |
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Director: John Woo |
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Starring: Chow Yun-Fat |
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Likely
wins the award for most bullets fired in a feature film. |
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1984 |
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UK |
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Director: Roland Joffé |
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Starring: Sam Waterston, Haing S. Ngor |
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1997 |
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USA |
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Director: Martin Scorsese |
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Starring: (Tibetan cast) |
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The Dalai Lama's story. Who would have expected a movie this beautiful from Scorsese? Excellent soundtrack by
Philip Glass.
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1977 |
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Australia |
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Director: Peter Weir |
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Starring: Richard Chamberlain |
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Surrealist
psychological drama. Australian lawyer defending Aboriginal experiences
apocalyptic premonitions.
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1995 |
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USA |
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Director: Mike Figgis |
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Starring: Nicholas Cage, Elisabeth Shue |
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Actually,
love doesn't conquer all. |
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1998 |
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USA |
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Director: Werner Herzog |
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Starring: Dieter Dengler (Documentary) |
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I find it amazing to see how
experiences shape a person's life and the decisions they make. This is
one remarkable tale. |
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Man
Facing Southeast |
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1987 |
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Argentina |
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Director: Eliseo Subiela |
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Starring: (Argentine cast) |
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Psychotic
or extraterrestrial? You choose. |
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Manon
of the Spring |
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1986 |
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France / Italy |
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Director: Claude Berri |
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Starring: Yves Montand, Emmanuelle Beart |
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1978 |
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USA / UK |
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Director: Alan Parker |
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Starring: Brad Davis, John Hurt |
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US
drug smuggler escapes from Turkish prison. This is one of the first films I screened
as a theater projectionist in high school, and put visit Turkey
on indefinite hold. |
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2001 |
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Australia / USA |
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Director: Baz Luhrmann |
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Starring: Nicole Kidman, Ewan McGregor |
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This film explodes off the screen
at you. I cried laughing during the
Like a Virgin
jiggling jello scene.
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1994 |
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Australia |
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Director: P.J. Hogan |
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Starring: Toni Colette, Rachel Griffiths |
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Wallflower
ABBA fan seeks fantasy wedding. |
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2007 |
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USA |
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Director: Charles Ferguson |
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Starring: (Documentary) |
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1981 |
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UK / USA |
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Director: Michael Lindsay-Hogg, William Pohlad |
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Starring: John Malkovich, Andie MacDowell |
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"Things
will work out OK... They always do." |
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1981 |
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USA |
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Director: Taylor Hackford |
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Starring: Richard Gere, Debra Winger |
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Self-centered
man undergoes character growth. |
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1975 |
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USA |
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Director: Miloš Forman |
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Starring: Jack Nicholson, Louise Fletcher |
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1988 |
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USA / UK |
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Director: James Dearden |
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Starring: Ben Kingsley, Helen Mirren, Charles Dance |
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Not available on DVD |
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1985 |
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USA |
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Director: Tim Burton |
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Starring: Paul Reubens |
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1993 |
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Australia / France |
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Director: Jane Campion |
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Starring: Holly Hunter, Harvey Keitel, Sam Neill |
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Portrait
of a Serial Kisser |
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1992 |
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Brazil |
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Director: Carlos Nader |
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Starring: José Alves de Moura (Docu-Comedy) |
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Brazilian
obsessive-compulsive can't be stopped. No one is safe, especially visiting
celebrities.
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1988 |
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USA |
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Director: Godfrey Reggio |
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Starring: N/A (Documentary) |
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Riveting
collage of images and music. No dialog (i.e., a "non-verbal" film). |
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1991 |
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Australia |
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Director: Jocelyn Moorhouse |
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Starring: Hugo Weaving, Russell Crowe |
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Blind
photographer seeks the truth. |
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1991 |
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UK / France |
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Director: Peter Greenaway |
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Starring: John Gielgud, Isabelle Pasco |
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1994 |
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USA |
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Director: Quentin Tarantino |
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Starring: John Travolta, Samuel L. Jackson, Harvey Keitel, Uma Thurman, Christopher Walken |
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1979 |
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UK |
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Director: Franc Roddam |
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Starring: Phil Daniels, Leslie Ash, Sting |
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Mods
vs. Rockers rumble in 1960s Brighton. Soundtrack by The
Who. |
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1981 |
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USA |
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Director: Steven Spielberg |
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Starring: Harrison Ford, Karen Allen, Denholm Elliot |
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1988 |
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USA |
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Director: Barry Levinson |
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Starring: Tom Cruise, Dustin Hoffman |
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1984 |
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USA |
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Director: John Byrum |
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Starring: Bill Murray, Denholm Elliot |
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Bill
Murray, in a serious role, did screenplay for and spearheaded this adaptation
of W.
Somerset Maugham's "story of one man's search for himself."
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1998 |
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Italy / Canada |
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Director: François Girard |
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Starring: Samuel L. Jackson, Greta Scacchi |
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A
musical instrument transcends geography, culture, economics, language, politics,
race, love, and history. |
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 |
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1981 |
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USA |
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Director: Warren Beatty |
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Starring: Warren Beatty, Diane Keaton, Jack Nicholson |
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Historical
romance of radical
U.S. labor organizer. |
 |
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 |
Click here. | ||
|
1998 |
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USA |
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|
Director: Barbara Sonneborn |
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Starring: (Documentary) |
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 |
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 |
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2000 |
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USA |
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|
Director: Darren Aronofsky |
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Starring: Ellen Burstyn, Jennifer Connelly, Jared Leto, Marlon Wayans |
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|
The author of Last Exit to Brooklyn and the director of Pi create bizarre, surreal, dark, and overlapping tales of addiction and its consequences. Parents, see the unedited version with your teenagers. |
 |
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 |
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1983 |
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USA |
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|
Director: Paul Brickman |
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Starring: Tom Cruise, Rebecca DeMornay |
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|
 |
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 |
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1981 |
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Australia |
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|
Director: George Miller |
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Starring: Mel Gibson, Bruce Spence |
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|
Post-apocalyptic sequel to
Mad
Max. Gyro Captain is my favorite. Another reason to visit
Australia! |
 |
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 |
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1989 |
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USA |
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|
Director: Michael Moore |
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|
Starring: N/A (Docu-Comedy) |
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|
Iconoclast investigates the decline and fall of Flint, Michigan after
General Motors plant closes. Rabbit lady is my favorite. |
 |
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1995 |
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USA |
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|
Director: Todd Haynes |
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Starring: Julianne Moore |
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Applause
for spotlighting the socially misunderstood but personally debilitating
medical condition known as "chemical
sensitivity." |
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 |
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1983 |
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USA |
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|
Director: Brian de Palma |
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Starring: Al Pacino, Michelle Pfeiffer |
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Exiled
Cuban crim turns Miami drug lord. Screenplay by Oliver Stone. |
 |
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 |
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1994 |
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USA |
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Director: Frank Darabont |
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Starring: Tim Robbins, Morgan Freeman |
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 |
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 |
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1980 |
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USA |
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Director: Stanley Kubrick |
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|
Starring: Jack Nicholson, Shelley Duvall |
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|
Stay
out of Room 237. As horror stories made into movies, it's the diamond in
Steven King's pile of glass. |
 |
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1995 |
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UK |
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|
Director: Nancy Meckler |
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Starring: Joely Richardson, Julie Walters, Jodhi May |
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 |
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1996 |
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USA |
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Director: Billy Bob Thornton |
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Starring: Billy Bob Thornton, Robert Duvall |
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"I don't reckon I got no reason to kill nobody." |
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1999 |
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USA |
||
|
Director: Scott Hicks |
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|
Starring: Ethan Hawke, Max von Sydow, James Cromwell, Youki Kudoh |
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|
Casting. Script. Lighting. Cinematography.
Screenplay. Soundtrack. Editing. This film is a simply awesome combination
of talent. Another Australian director triumphs! |
 |
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1986 |
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USA |
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|
Director: Jonathan Demme |
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|
Starring: Jeff Daniels, Melanie Griffith, Ray Liotta |
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|
Straight-laced
yuppie corrupted by wild girl. |
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 |
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1982 |
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USA |
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|
Director: Alan J. Pakula |
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Starring: Meryl Streep, Kevin Kline |
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|
 |
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 |
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1977 |
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USA |
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Director: George Lucas |
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Starring: Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Alec Guiness |
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|
 |
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1987 |
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USA |
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Director: Jonathan Demme |
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|
Starring: Spaulding Gray |
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|
Experimental
theater. This man has simply unbounded personal energy. |
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 |
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1984 |
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USA |
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|
Director: James Cameron |
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|
Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton |
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|
Indestructible cyborg sent back in time on a mission. |
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 |
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1991 |
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USA |
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Director: James Cameron |
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Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton |
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|
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1991 |
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USA |
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Director: Ridley Scott |
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Starring: Susan Sarandon, Gina Davis, Harvey Keitel, Brad Pitt |
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|
 |
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 |
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1994 |
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|
UK |
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|
Director: Gus Van Sant, Jr. |
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|
Starring: Nicole Kidman, Matt Dillon, Joaquin Phoenix |
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|
"The price of fame is murder." |
 |
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 |
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2003 |
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UK |
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|
Director: Kevin MacDonald |
|||
|
Starring: Joe Simpson, Simon Yates (Docu-drama) |
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|
Gripping testament to human endurance. This fellow, seriously lucky to have survived a mountain-climbing accident in the Peruvian Andes, puffs a cigarette as he retells his tale! |
 |
||
 |
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1995 |
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USA |
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|
Director: John Lasseter |
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Starring: (Animated) |
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|
 |
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 |
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1999 |
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USA |
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|
Director: John Lasseter |
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|
Starring: (Animated) |
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|
Another sequel even better than the original. |
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||
 |
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|
1985 |
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USA |
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|
Director: Peter Masterson |
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Starring: Geraldine Page, Rebecca DeMornay |
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|
 |
||
 |
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1993 |
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USA |
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|
Director: Tony Scott |
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|
Starring: Christian Slater, Patricia Arquette, Dennis Hopper, Christopher Walken, Brad Pitt |
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|
Written
by Quentin Tarantino. |
 |
||
 |
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|
1996 |
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USA |
|||
|
Director: Christopher Guest |
|||
|
Starring: Christopher Guest, Eugene Levy |
|||
|
Will
Corky make it to Broadway? |
 |
||
 |
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|
1987 |
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USA |
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|
Director: Oliver Stone |
|||
|
Starring: Charlie Sheen, Michael Douglas |
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|
"Greed is good." |
 |
||
 |
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|
2005 |
|||
|
USA |
|||
|
Director: Eugene Jarecki |
|||
|
Starring: (Documentary) |
|||
|
Explores political,
economic, and ideological motivations to answer, "Why does America
engage in war?"
|
 |
||
 |
The
Widow of Saint-Pierre |
||
|
2000 |
|||
|
France |
|||
|
Director: Patrice Leconte |
|||
|
Starring: Juliette Binoche, Daniel Auteuil, Emir Kusturica |
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|
 |
||
 |
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|
1971 |
|||
|
USA |
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|
Director: Mel Stuart |
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|
Starring: Gene Wilder, Jack Albertson |
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|
Will poor Charlie find the winning ticket? From a
Roald Dahl story. |
 |
||
 |
||
|
2001 |
||
|
France |
||
|
Director: Jacques Perrin |
||
|
Starring: (Documentary) |
||
|
Director Jacques
Perrin comments,"For eighty million
years, birds have ruled the skies, seas and earth. Each spring, they fly
vast distances. Each fall, they fly the same route back. This film is
the result of four years following their amazing odysseys, in the
northern hemisphere and then the south, species by species, flying over
seas and continents." |
 |
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|
1939font> |
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|
USA |
|||
|
Director: Victor Fleming |
|||
|
Starring: Judy Garland |
|||
|
"Gone with the Wind" stole all the Oscars that year. (Another good
reason not to watch the Oscars!) |
 |
||
| Interesting Connections from Above: |
|
 |
And the award goes
to...
|
Best Film-Making Country |
Australia |
Babe, Bad Boy Bubby, , Breaker Morant, Cane Toads, Gallipoli, The Last Wave, Muriel's Wedding, The Piano, Proof, The Road Warrior (plus directors like Peter Weir, Jane Campion, and Scott Hicks; cinematographers like Dean Semler; actors like Nicole Kidman, Russell Crowe, and Toni Collette, etc. |
||
|
Best Directors |
Peter Weir |
The Last Wave (1977), Gallipoli (1981), Witness (1985), The Mosquito Coast (1986), Dead Poets Society (1989), Greencard (1990) |
||
|
Scott Hicks |
Shine (1996), Snow Falling on Cedars (1999) |
|||
|
Worst Directors |
Robert Altman |
The Player (1992), Prêt-à-Porter (1994) |
||
|
Whit Stillman |
Barcelona (1994), The Last Days of Disco (1998) |
|||
|
Best Actors |
Dustin Hoffman |
The Graduate (1967), Midnight Cowboy (1969), Straw Dogs (1971), Papillon (1973), All the President's Men (1974), Marathon Man (1976), Kramer vs. Kramer (1979), Tootsie (1982), Death of a Salesman (1985), Rain Man (1988) |
||
|
Jack Nicholson |
Easy Rider (1967), Chinatown (1974), One Flew over the Cuckoo's Nest (1975), The Shining (1980), A Few Good Men (1992) |
|||
|
Lon Chaney, Sr. |
The Hunchback of Notre Dame (1923), The Phantom of the Opera (1925), Mr. Wu (1927) ... Died of lung cancer at age 47. |
|||
|
Philip Seymour Hoffman |
Magnolia (1999), Capote (2000), Before the Devil Knows you're Dead (2007), Charlie Wilson's War (2007) |
|||
|
Max von Sydow |
The Seventh Seal (1957), The Exorcist (1973), Snow Falling on Cedars (1999) |
|||
|
Worst Actors |
Haley Joel Osment, Keanu Reeves, Macaulay Culkin, Patrick Swayze, Paul Hogan, Tom Selleck |
|||
|
Best Actresses |
Meryl Streep |
Kramer vs. Kramer (1979), Sophie's Choice (1982), Silkwood (1983), Out of Africa (1985), A Cry in the Dark (1988) |
||
|
Nicole Kidman |
Dead Calm (1989), To Die For (1995), Moulin Rouge (2001), Birthday Girl (2001) |
|||
|
Worst Actresses |
Angela Lansbury, Gwyneth Paltrow, Jennifer Lopez, Rosie Perez, Shirley MacLaine |
|||
|
Actresses I wished I'd seen more of but never did |
Leslie Ash |
|
||
|
Lori Singer |
|
|||
|
Mia Sara |
|
|||
|
Phoebe Cates |
|
|||
|
Highly talented actors I personally can't stand |
Sean Penn |
|
||
|
Russell Crowe |
|
|||
|
Talented but somewhat unidimensional actors |
David Duchovny, John Cusack, John Malkovich, Kevin Spacey, Richard Gere |
|||
|
Best Cinematography |
Apocalypto |
2006 |
by Dean Semler |
Cinematic maestro from South Australia. |
|
Baraka |
1993 |
by Ron Fricke |
And in 70mm, too. Gorgeous. |
|
|
Dances with Wolves |
1990 |
by Dean Semler |
Obviously, the best cinematographer to ever walk the earth. |
|
|
The Mission |
1986 |
by Chris Menges |
I need to visit Iguasu Falls! |
|
|
The Road Warrior |
1981 |
by Dean Semler |
Whether it's sweeping vistas or high-speed pursuits in jalopies, Dean is the man! |
|
|
Snow Falling on Cedars |
1999 |
by Robert Richardson |
What a stunningly gorgeous piece of film-making this is! |
|
|
Best Editing |
El Mariachi |
1992 |
by Robert Rodriguez |
Somebody did a count of the number of individual cuts which make up this film. Lots! |
|
JFK |
1991 |
by Hank Corwin, |
No wonder it took 3 editors to piece this legendary film together! |
|
|
Prospero's Books |
1991 |
by Marina Rodbyl |
Screens embedded one within another, fancy cursive script rolling across the screen. Stunning. |
|
|
Snow Falling on Cedars |
1999 |
by Hank Corwin |
Weaves 3 stories perfectly. |
|
|
Best Lighting |
9½ Weeks |
1986 |
. |
Could have been cheesy and sleazy given the subject matter. Lighting made it downright artistic. |
|
Snow Falling on Cedars |
1999 |
. |
Atmospheric. Whether indoors or outdoors, the lighting is rich and ideal to the scene. |
|
|
Best Soundtracks |
The Piano |
1993 |
by Michael Nyman |
A modern musical masterpiece which ranks alongside anything a classical composer ever wrote. |
|
Quadrophenia |
1979 |
by The Who |
Based on a1973 rock opera by Pete Townshend. |
|
|
Best Set Design / Decoration |
Apocalypto |
2006 |
by Carlos Benassini |
|
|
Chitty Chitty Bang Bang |
1968 |
by Harry Pottle |
||
|
Star Wars |
1977 |
by Roger Christian |
||
|
The Wizard of Oz |
1939 |
by Edwin B. Willis |
||
|
Best Non-Verbal Films |
Baraka |
1992 |
Ron Fricke |
Shot at 152 locations in 24 countries. |
|
Powaqqatsi |
1988 |
Godfrey Reggio |
An exploration of technologically developing nations and the effect the transition to Western-style modernization has had on them. |
|
|
|
||||
|
Weirdest Movies |
An
Andalusian Dog |
1929 |
Luis Buñuel |
This film is so bizarre and disturbing. You'll wish you had those 16 minutes back. |
|
Being John Malkovich |
1999 |
Spike Jonz |
Puppeteer discovers portal leading into head of movie star. |
|
|
1977 |
David Lynch |
One critic described Lynch's style as "unstructured weirdness." That about says it. |
||
|
May |
2002 |
Lucky McKee |
A weird character in a weird story. |
|
|
Pi |
1998 |
Darren Aranofsky |
Tough to watch. This director's follow-up offering, Requiem for a Dream (2000) is far better. |
|
|
1989 |
Shinya Tsukamoto |
Japanese. Lots of stop-motion heaps of metal parts morphing into people. Subtitles didn't help. |
||
|
Most Disgusting
Movies |
Pink Flamingoes |
1972 |
John Waters |
Divine aimed low, and never missed her target. Female Trouble (1974) is my personal favorite...."Hello, this is Dawn Davenport...Dawn Davenport! You made love to me Christmas morning. I'm pregnant and I want money!" |
|
Salò: 120 Days of Sodom |
1975 |
Pier Paolo Pasolini |
I haven't seen it. I've only read the reviews. Are movies like this necessary? |
|
|
Movies NOT for first dates |
Last House on the Left (1972), I Spit on your Grave (1978), 8MM (1999), Irreversible (2002) |
|||
|
Movies I showed as projectionist
in theaters |
The Atomic Cafe (1982), The Elephant Man (1980), Frances (1982), Gallipoli (1981), The Last Wave (1977), Midnight Express (1978), Quadrophenia (1979), Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981), Reds (1981), The Road Warrior (1981) |
|||
|
Movies I saw at international
film festivals |
Baraka (1993), Cinema Paradiso (1988), El Mariachi (1992), Jean de Florette (1986), The Killer (1989), Manon of the Spring (1986), Roger and Me (1989), Sister my Sister (1994) |
|||
|
Movies which feature my surname (Bauer) |
The Blue Max |
1966 |
A WWI fighter pilot named "Bauer" is featured on the German squadron's tally board. |
|
|
Dances with Wolves |
1989 |
Sgt. Bauer (portrayed by Larry Joshua) beats Lt. John Dunbar (Kevin Costner) while transporting him to his execution at Fort Sedgwick. (I was born in Sedgwick County, Kansas.) |
||
|
Driving Miss Daisy |
1989 |
Miss Daisy (portrayed by Jessica Tandy) instructs chauffer Hoke (Morgan Freeman) to locate a gravestone which reads "Bauer." |
||
|
Splash |
1984 |
Tom Hanks and John Candy portray brothers Allen and Freddie Bauer. |
||
|
Best Movies |
Baraka |
1993 |
Ron Fricke |
Pure celluloid poetry. God, I envy whoever got to shoot this film. |
|
The Elephant Man |
1980 |
David Lynch |
Who would have expected a film this beautiful from the same director as Eraserhead? |
|
|
The Killing Fields |
1984 |
Roland Joffé |
Why is genocide still happening in the world after masterpiece movies like this? |
|
|
Midnight Express |
1978 |
Alan Parker |
Loosely based on a true story |
|
|
The Piano |
1993 |
Jane Campion |
OK, you found it... my #1 greatest film of all time. Jane Campion, you nailed it! |
|
|
Quadrophenia |
1979 |
Frank Roddam |
I saw the trailer for this at a Who concert in 1979. The ultimate teen angst film. Very classy. |
|
|
Snow Falling on Cedars |
1999 |
Scott Hicks |
Every aspect of this film came together magically. |
|
|
Sophie's Choice |
1982 |
Alan J. Pakula |
I sat there, stunned, for several minutes after watching this on a 13" black & white TV in college. |
|
|
Worst Movies |
After Hours | 1985 | Martin Scorsese |
Nothing in this film is remotely funny. The dialog is contrived. The
plotline is ridiculous. Example, what red-blooded male would pick a
fight with Rosanna Arquette, in bed, over a paper maché bagel
paperweight, then storm out? Give me a break. Scorsese needs to stay out
of comedy.
|
|
Batteries not Included |
1987 |
Steven Spielberg |
Soppy. Cloying. Annoying. Not remotely funny. Really, really bad. Steven Spielberg, what were you thinking? Recommend you pull this from video store shelves and hope the world forgets about it. I boycotted "AI: Artificial Intelligence," partially fearing another stinker like this movie. |
|
|
Barcelona |
1994 |
Whit Stillman |
The only thing more obnoxious than young, rich, pretentious Americans overseas, are movies about young, rich, pretentious Americans overseas. Please, please don't get suckered into renting this video. I have avoided seeing The Last Days of Disco by this same director, Fool me once, shame on you... |
|
| Before Sunrise | 1995 | Richard Linklater |
This is a painful 101 minutes to sit through. The script is full of
contrived dialog and lofty, philosophical mutual masturbation. There
were continuity problems (e.g. actors positioned differently in
follow-on scenes from different angles). It was unrealistic. (How long
had the American been taking trains around Europe without knowing 21:30
means 9:30pm?) Scruffy Ethan Hawke could have doubled for Shaggy on
Scooby Doo. If he was serious about this chick, he would have followed
her back to Paris. Been there, done that, bought the postcard...
|
|
| The Black Dahlia | 2006 | Brian de Palma |
I was hoping for a story told from Elizabeth Short's perspective.
Instead, this film was all over the place with extraneous characters and
events, like boxing matches. It rambled on with bad acting, fight scenes
downright fake, etc. A rubbish film. I switched it off after 30 or 45
minutes of going nowhere. Don't waste your time.
|
|
| Casino Royale | 2006 | Martin Campbell |
Bond movies keep getting worse. This is the worst yet. Boring storyline.
Dull characters. Serious credibility problems. I gave up on this movie
when Bond was administering self-defibrillation. I know we're expected
to check any critical thinking capacity at the theater door for any Bond
film. But please.
|
|
|
Cocktail |
1988 |
Roger Donaldson |
I have not subjected myself to this movie, based upon the horrible comments of others. After Risky Business, Top Gun, and Rain Man, Tom Cruise's audiences might expect him to pick his scripts a little better. How bad could a movie be? I'll take their word for it. |
|
| The Edge | 1997 | Lee Tamahori | One question... How is it that that fine actors like Anthony Hopkins and Alec Baldwin, a screenplay written by the magnificent David Mamet (of Glengarry Glen Ross fame), a spectacular Alaskan cinematographic backdrop, and delicious eye-candy like Elle McPherson combine to result in rubbish like this? I guess someone forgot to ask how exciting it would be to watch a bear chase people around for 117 minutes. Not very. | |
| Flirting | 1991 | John Duigan | One question... How did Nicole Kidman's and Noah Taylor's fledgling careers survive this piece of crap film? Like French films, Australians either soar to glorious heights, or fail miserably. Two other films I saw by this director, Wide Sargasso Sea (1993) and Sirens (1994) also were boring as hell. | |
| Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom |
1984 |
Steven Spielberg |
Leave it to Lucas and Spielberg to thoroughly screw up a perfectly good original (Raiders of the Lost Ark) with this piece of celluloid rubbish. Like Jar-Jar Binks in the Star Wars prequels, these otherwise accomplished filmmakers take a reductionist approach to pitch adventure to 4-year-olds. Thanks guys, for insulting everyone else's intelligence, and wasting 2 hours of your audiences' time. Thankfully, I never saw Kate Capshaw in another film. |
|
|
Interview with the Vampire |
1994 |
Neil Jordan |
I can see the pitch for this movie... Let's mix 4 attractive and successful actors (Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt, Christian Slater, and Antonio Banderas) with Kirsten Dunst and a successful novel. Something went terribly wrong, maybe screenplay or direction. I pulled the plug on it part-way through. Horror? More like horrible! I nearly wretched when I saw Oprah plugging this awful film alongside Tom Cruise on her show. |
|
|
IQ |
1994 |
Fred Scepisi |
Maybe I reconsider my affinity for Australian directors. Fred Scepisi, were you trying to insult audiences' intelligence with this movie, or did you accomplish it by accident? You can see Meg Ryan and Tim Robbins seething under the painful script. Calling this romantic comedy is highly disingenuous. |
|
|
Rosalee goes Shopping |
1989 |
Percy Adlon |
A morbidly obese woman buying stuff on credit for 94 minutes is not funny. It's just not. |
|
|
Speaking Parts |
1989 |
Atom Egoyan |
What a load of rubbish! I saw this at an international film festival. Canada must hand out film financing like candy. |
|
|
Last House on the Left |
1972 |
Wes Craven |
Give any high school kid a video camera, and they could shoot a film like this. Cheesy. Gratuitous sexual violence. Not scary at all. |
|
|
Shattered |
1991 |
Wolfgang Petersen |
Wolfgang Petersen directed this rubbish. Sexy Greta Scacchi doth not a movie make. The ill-defining moment for me was splicing crashing ocean waves into the lovemaking scene, to the soundtrack of Moody Blues' "Nights in White Satin." What a loser! Shattered? Emphasis on the "Shat." |
|
| Shortbus | 2006 | John Cameron Mitchell |
Without doubt, the worst garbage ever to be committed to celluloid. If
you're looking for porn, do yourself a favor and rent legitimate porn,
not some sick %$#@ parading as art. I won't go into detail. (Kids may be
reading this.) It's just disgusting by any measure. Reviewers believing
this is cinematic genius are seriously delusional. What pervert wants to
see a close-up of some guy peeing in the bathtub? This is perversion
without any discernable countervailing value.
|
|
|
Simone |
2002 |
Andrew Niccol |
Al Pacino (and Robert Deniro) should both stay out of comedy. It's painful to watch an accomplished actor crushed under the weight of a lousy script. A beautiful but rebellious computer-generated actress? Who exactly thought that could be funny? | |
|
The Sixth Sense |
1999 |
M. Night Shyamalan |
Six Oscar nominations, including one for the irritating Haley Joel Osment... You must be joking!. What, was this film trying to mimic The Exorcist or The Shining? It bills itself as "The Greatest Thriller of All Time." Talk about hype... Don't you believe it! (I avoided Signs by the same director.) |
|
|
The Talented Mr. Ripley |
1999 |
Anthony Minghella |
See Barcelona comment above. Thoroughly unlikable characters. Matt Damon, what happened to you? Oh how the mighty have fallen. That surprise homoerotic ending really rubbed salt into the audience's wounds, too. Jeesh. Gwyneth Paltrow, grab your cigarettes and go home. |
|
|
Tron |
1982 |
Steve Lisberger |
I never knew how god-awful boring a movie could be. Thank you, thank you, thank you... for thoroughly wasting 96 minutes of my life. Special effects doth not a movie make. Bad in 1982, and even worse today. Phooey. |
|
| The Upside of Anger | 2005 | Mike Binder |
Absolute rubbish. This movie wasted an hour of my time before I stopped.
There is nothing remotely funny about an alcoholic woman flipping off
the father of neighborhood kids playing, in response to him motioning to
slow her driving down. There was nothing likeable about these
characters, any of them. There was no discernable plot. Why does Costner
sign up for junk like this? This film is why I avoid romantic comedies.
|
|
| Whale Rider | 2003 | Niki Caro |
This is what happens when a national government subsidizes their
indigenous film industry. Thoroughly unlikable characters. Bad acting.
Banal plot and script. This is not, repeat NOT, some lighthearted kids'
movie. This is one seriously dysfunctional family, and the mistreatment
appears to permeate the whole culture. If "a people" treat their kids
this poorly, don't expect one of them to "lead them back to greatness."
Serious disappointment. I rode an hour of this blubber before harpooning
it.
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Awarded
a record £5m compensation for catching
superbug MRSA in hospital, while being treated for a punctured lung and two
cracked ribs she claimed to have sustained during a sex session with
ex-footballer husband. (She was fully clothed when paramedics arrived, and hubby
was arrested, though no charges were pressed.) She was briefly paralyzed from the waist down and still
walks with a stick. Thoroughly unnecessary collagen lip implant surgery was
botched. leaving her
with
Born to a conductor father and pianist mother, Singer became an accomplished cellist.
She graduated Julliard School of Acting, and won various awards for cello and the limited acting work since her mid-80s screen debut.
Married (1981). Had one son (1991). Divorced (1998). 
Co-starred with Jean-Claude Van Dam
in Timecop (1994).
Married Jason Connery (Sean Connery's son) in 1996. Had a son (1997). Divorced (2002). Acted in a few made-for-TV movies.
Basement dwellers have posted online various sex scenes she's done. (I assume
those were made for European TV movies, not U.S.) Recent acting is on various
TV series. Long brown locks are long gone. I didn't recognize her.
Acted on stage and in some lesser films
throughout the 80s.
Married Oscar-winning actor Kevin Kline (1989).
Had a son (1991) and a daughter (1994),
then went into semi-retirement from films to raise kids.
Opened a Madison Ave. boutique in 2005.
"In this business, if a girl wants a career, she has to be willing to strip.
If you've got a good bod, then why not show it?" (I assume she's talking about
the acting business, not fashion merchandising!)
Who foresaw Jeff Spicoli maturing to be a
powerhouse director chairing the Cannes Festival jury?
I watched Crowe during the 90s in
Australian movie theaters... 
